When You’re Bone Tired: A Prayer for the Overwhelmed Heart

Sometimes there are just no words.

Like today. I’m bone tired. My body hurts. My emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion from the last few weeks is threatening to overtake me. A woman on my team at work is enduring a horrible family tragedy. I received news that not one, but two, close friends got doctor reports of cancer. It’s been a crazy month end/quarter end at work. Then my daughter has daily volleyball practices or games to add into the mix. I’ve been sick for the past week. And don’t even get me started on the state of our world and the nightly news.

It’s all so heavy. And I know it’s not just me, I see it on so many of my loved ones' faces. I sense the heavy weights they are carrying too, and the worry and stress they have.

I’ve spent the last week studying Ephesians 3, and I was tempted to skip this post. I’m overwhelmed and I don’t have the strength to write, plus I’ve been sick all week and am just starting to recover. But God knew we would all need Paul's prayer today.

This isn't a prayer from a place of strength; it's a prayer for strength.

“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father... that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend... the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory... forever and ever. Amen.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭3‬:‭14-21‬ ‭ESV‬‬‬‬

This is our hope. We don’t have to muster our own strength. We cannot. But He can.

Heart Home Renovations

Paul was praying for the believers to have the power to welcome Jesus fully into their hearts. Even after we are saved, it’s an ongoing process for Christ to make Himself at home in the center of our affections and decisions.

The power of the Holy Spirit isn't just for a one-time save; it's for an everyday transformation.

I love this visual from Richard Coekin’s commentary, Ephesians for You. He explains that when the Spirit of Christ moves in, He doesn't just visit; He renovates.

“Room by room, the horrible old wallpapers of selfishness are replaced with brand new wallpaper called love; the old ceilings darkened by fear of death are repainted with bright colors of hope... filthy old carpets stained by years of immorality are replaced with clean new carpets of purity... and the rickety old furniture of idolatry is gradually replaced with the sparkling new ministries that worship Jesus...

He will gently and gradually but radically be transforming our interiors—because he loves us.”

This is the "Grace > Performance" lens. We think we have to fix up the "rooms" of our hearts before God will move in. We try to scrub the floors and hide the junk. But God's grace works the other way. He moves in first, and then, because He loves us, He starts the renovation.

He does all the doing. It’s not up to our natural gifts or physical strength. His grace and His power are available to us, but we have to do one thing that is so hard: we have to die to self, lay down our pride, and admit we can’t do it alone. We have to pray and ask for His help.

Bold & Confident

What is the result of this internal renovation? What happens when we let His power work in us?

“...in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through our faith in him.” ‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭3‬:‭12‬ ‭ESV‬‬

Because of His Grace and His Power >>> Boldness + Confidence.

I’ve always wanted to be bold and confident, but it somehow escaped me. Because of my fear of man and rejection, I would shrink back, remain small, and hide. I thought if I could just look like I had it all together on the outside, somehow by osmosis I would feel it on the inside.

That didn't work.

Then God called me to do something really hard: give up my external fake masks. I traded in my long, straight, blonde hair for my naturally short, curly, brown hair. I removed my breast implants. I had put so much confidence and value in my appearance, but looking back, it never delivered the confidence it promised. It was all fake, and being fake never fulfills. What areas do you try to fake it in that aren’t fulfilling you?

Then I went to see Inside Out 2 with my girls, and it all started to make sense. I could so relate to Riley, trying to be like everyone else as Anxiety took over the control panel in my mind. At one point, Joy has to use dynamite to blow up a mountain of bad memories to get back to headquarters and save Riley from Anxiety. I think so many of us daily need the Joy of the Lord to save us from the Anxiety this world throws at us.

I realized my explant surgery was my dynamite. It blew everything up, forcing me to deal with all the old beliefs I had buried. But in the rubble, my true identity in Christ—the boldness and confidence that had been there all along—was finally uncovered. Often, the biggest breakdowns in life lead to our biggest breakthroughs!

It was always inside, and He was always the source, not me. And now, by His grace, it can finally come out too! This same boldness and confidence is available to you today in Christ. You now have access to approach God the Father, laying all your burdens and anxieties at His feet.

I think the most bold and confident thing we can do is ask God for help.

His Grace Changes Everything

Life is still hard. The world is still heavy. But I am not trying to muster my own strength. I can feel His strength rising up within me, and the burdens don't feel as heavy anymore. I am learning to rest and rely on His.

It’s so comforting to know that He does all the doing. It’s not up to our natural gifts or physical strength. Our job is simply to surrender and trust.

Paul’s prayer is my prayer for you: that you would be strengthened with His power in your inner being, that you would be rooted in His love, and that you would be filled with all the fullness of God.

Because He "is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us" (Eph. 3:20).

With love, grace, and peace,

Jessica Grace Pegram